Lambs

He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with his arm, and carry them in his bosom
~Isaiah 40:11

When I finalized that scripture which we used on Dominic's headstone, it hadn't occurred to me that I might regret plurals. Lambs. Them. It hadn't seemed at all to me then that perhaps it could be a foreshadowing.

This past Sunday we walked down to the cemetery as a family. Just as you approach, on the corner across the road there is a small hobby farm. And several lambs had been born. We had stopped to pick some greens on the way, and the kids enjoyed offering their treats to the animals. I had to remind them that the newborn lambs might not be as interested, as their mother's milk was their source for food at this early age.

I have fed you with milk, and not with meat: for hitherto ye were not able to bear it, neither yet now are ye able.
~ 1 Corinthians 3:2

I noticed the two smallest little lambs stayed together. The one a little bigger seemed to be kindly watching over the smaller one. They really weren't that much different in size. How could I not think of my own two little lambs? I wondered if Dominic, only just slightly bigger than his little sister, was also kindly tending to Bridget.


After some time, we began getting ready to leave. And then I noticed a little lamb in the feeder.

It kept standing, as if to try to climb out, and would slip on its weak little legs and stumble back down. The sheep that appeared to be his mother came and laid down next to the feeder, but didn't seem to make an attempt at rescuing the little lamb.


Over and over again the little lamb stood, only to fall back down. I became quite concerned. I was very distraught each time the lamb fell, wondering if it would become too injured before it could be rescued. I thought about climbing the fence, but wasn't sure how the animals would respond to that. I didn't want to cause more harm, but I was very concerned about this one little lamb.


I sent my children to the door of the home nearby, hoping they were the owners of the animals. Fortunately, there was someone there who knew what to do. And the little lamb was safely rescued.
We were told that another lamb had actually been trapped in the feeder and died, and that it was good we had thought to notify them. There were so many stories about each of the little lambs there, and we stayed a bit longer to hear about each of them.

One mother had delivered triplets. The first lamb came out wrong and died. The next two little lambs she delivered also died, and then the mother died, too. I could understand why that mother died. How sad it was to have all three of her little ones perish!

Another mother had twins. One twin died, the other survived. The mother was quite protective of the living baby. I could understand that as well!

Another mother had triplets, and though had only two teats to feed them was caring for all of them. All three little lambs seemed to be doing well.

Another mother had twins. When the first was born, she licked it clean and nursed it. The second baby that was born was rejected. Abandoned. The mother never cleaned it. And each time the baby tried to nurse, the mother would knock it away. I couldn't understand that at all! We were told it is very uncommon, but that it does sometimes happen. I asked what would happen if the mother kept rejecting the baby. It would be bottle fed. They'd have to get some milk from the mother, of course, because the baby would need the colostrum. Without that, it would die. Then after a few days they could get some formula for the baby to drink. It would be very difficult in the beginning, with multiple feedings each day. But as time went on it would be easier.

I thought about how I'd wanted Bridget to have my colostrum. How the hospital had not stored it properly and it had spoiled. How I was grateful I'd insisted that she breastfeed those first few days, so I knew she had had some colostrum. But had it been enough?

I thought of a mother's rejection. And how it was so uncommon. And I wondered what a little lamb could have done to have lost favor with his own mother. And I wondered what I could have done to have lost favor with my Father. Here on earth, yes-- but more, in the Heavens.

What man of you, having an hundred sheep, if he lose one of them, doth not leave the ninety and nine in the wilderness, and go after that which is lost, until he find it?
~Luke 15:4

And in the absence of a Father, would the Shepherd go to the little lamb? Would He put in the effort necessary to rescue the rejected lamb? Rescue. Foreshadowing, parallel. And I didn't know that within a couple of hours, I would hear those words. About a sheep, a lone animal, stuck on the side of the mountain. And where was the shepherd to rescue her?


We continued on to the cemetery. The kids enjoyed "petting" the little lamb on Dominic's headstone. And I began to wonder what Bridget's headstone will be like. And I hated thinking that there is still another headstone to be made for yet another of my little ones. It had been so important to me that Dominic's headstone have a little lamb on it. Would Bridget's have one too?


We decorated Dominic's and Bridget's graves with some bright flowers, Easter baskets filled with eggs, and some homemade Spring decorations.

They seemed to compliment the other garden decorations we have there.

The wolf also shall dwell with the lamb, and the leopard shall lie down with the kid; and the calf and the young lion and the fatling together; and a little child shall lead them.
~Isaiah 11:6

Not far from where Dominic and Bridget are buried, there is a statue of a Lion. I chose Dominic's burial place partly because of that Lion. Because my little lamb would be buried near there, and I would look forward to the day when the Lamb and the Lion would dwell together, so I could go to hold my little son again. I hadn't thought there would be more than one child to claim.

I went to the hospital in labor with Dominic on Easter. He was born early in the morning on Easter Monday. I had even wondered about naming him Pascal, "Easter child".

Those little lambs. Two little lambs. The Lamb. Lamb of God.

For all the rest shall be brought forth by the resurrection of the dead, through the triumph and the glory of the Lamb, who was slain, who was in the bosom of the Father before the worlds were made.
~Doctrine & Covenants 76:39